Beep, Beep, Beep, Beep, Yeah…

Buckle up, readers because we’re all in for a bit of a rocky ride…

My friend Gina and I (we’ve been friends for almost 45 years) recently went to a Sunset Wildflower event.  She drove to my house and then I insisted on driving the 9 miles to our final destination.  She warned me on the drive over that she liked being the person in the driver’s seat.  Initially I just laughed but I soon discovered that she was dead serious!  She worked her imaginary brake pedal more than I did – I guess that was part of the problem.  She also had a death grip on the handle at the top of her door.  She uttered many, many “Ohhh, ohhh, watch outs” on the drive home.  She shakily exited my car and proclaimed that next time SHE would be doing the driving.  I thought this was a little funny because I helped her learn how to drive and she took her driver’s test in my little Pontiac Sunbird 44 years ago.

I’ve been doing a lot of road travel this past Spring and Summer and there have been instances where I am left scratching my head in puzzlement and alarm at the actions of motorists.  The distance from my house to our little town is around 4 miles.  There are a couple of speed limit zones on the road ranging from 35 mph to 55 mph, back down to 35 mph and then 25 mph in the downtown area.  The 55 mph zone abruptly ends as you are coming down a hill and over a bridge and wham! It’s now suddenly 35 mph.  The police set up in this area frequently and so I always apply my brakes and get my SUV down to the speed limit as soon as I see that sign.  Unfortunately most of the people behind me don’t want to obey the traffic law and they tailgate me and sometimes blow their horn and flip me the bird.  Being the courteous old lady driver that I am, I throw up my hands in my rear view mirror, gesture to the numerous 35 mph signs posted along the roadway and flip them the bird in return.

I get extremely irritated at motorists who get out in the left lane on the interstate or turnpike and just putt-putt along there for miles and miles and miles.  They are oblivious to the line of cars and trucks behind them, usually they are texting on their phone and they won’t giddy up and go or switch over to the right lane. This causes a backup of cars who then tailgate you because they are in a hurry and feel the need for speed.  Hey jagoffs, we’re all stuck in the same situation, I can’t make the cars in front of me go any faster. And how about the drivers who never use a turn signal? And the ones who don’t understand the concept of what to do when 4 cars are at a 4 stop sign section?

And then there’s the meatheads who blatantly run a red light that’s been red for several seconds and you now have the green light.  It’s time to spike the brakes and say a little prayer!

Don’t even get me started on the inconsiderate jerks who take up several parking spots because they don’t want anyone getting close to their precious vehicle. Then there’s the lazy slobs who leave their shopping carts in the middle of the lot because apparently, it’s too far of a walk to take it back to the buggy corral.

Geez Louise, Gina – look at what you started!  I am on a roll!  LOL